Virgin Forests

non-subject: things not written about
AWW, 11/07/12

Untouched.

That is the word that comes to mind when I think of things not written about.

Which brings to mind Joyce Kilmer Memorial Forest in Western NC. It is a 3000-acre virgin forest with lots of poplar trees. Poplar trees have large leaves that look like a cat's head. I thought Joyce Kilmer was female, until I read about him on the engraved bronze plaque that is displayed at the forest entrance which bears his name.

Virgins.
Things not written about.

I do not write about my sexual fantasies. And I will not write about them now. They will stay untouched for now, hidden in my mind. In those fantasies I am definitely not a virgin.

There are dreams I've had over the years, sleep dreams, that I do not voice out loud or even in writing. Perhaps I am superstitious in a sense. I do not want those sleep dream to become reality; they involve death and torment of loved ones. Those too will stay untouched.

And now, now, now...I do not want to write.
I do not want to touch the keys on my computer keyboard.

Sometimes, I don't feel real. It's not that I feel fake, but rather I feel like I am in a dream. At those times I wonder if I am living in an alternate reality and that one day I, we, will wake up and discover that none of *this* is real.

Logically I know that isn't so.
But still I feel that way at times.

Some twenty plus years ago as I drove along Highway 127 South in Hickory heading toward Mountain View, I recall looking around and thinking how all that I saw was temporary; that it wasn't real. I often used to think that way. I would feel "out of place"...even driving alone in my car.

On the one particular occasion driving that afternoon on Highway 127, I realized that I felt that way because it was true. I was a believer and as the song goes, "This world is not my home, I'm just a passin' through." I thought of the Hope. That's what The Way called the time in the future when Jesus Christ will come back and gather all the saints in the air; it is "the Hope of the Return" or "the Hope" for short.

To believe in UFOs is not so absurd. I believed I would be changed in a moment in the twinkling of an eye and somehow in a new body I would pass through the heavens to some other realm. I didn't think about it too deeply, because it felt like such a fantasy.

I recall thinking that when I got my new body, I wanted to planet hop. I'd really like to ride the rings of Saturn.