Precarious Prayer

I've contemplated for years about what to say to people when they are going through hard times.

In my Bible-believing days I'd offer to pray for them - an ongoing silent prayer and out-loud prayer in the moment.

Now, as an agnostic, I often say that I'm sending good (or healing or whatever adjective meets the moment) thoughts and/or vibes. One time I said that to someone who reached out to me via private message on Facebook asking for prayer. They were apparently offended. They responded with something like, "We need prayer, not good thoughts." I think I responded with a simple, "Okay."

Currently one of my pet-sitting clients is going through the heart-wrenching process of the decision regarding at what point to euthanize her beloved dog. She's a Christian, so I told her that she and the family would be in my thoughts and prayers.

Almost immediately, thoughts began looping through my head. Is that hypocritical? To say I'll be praying for her? Are you just trying to not offend her since she is a Christian? What is the proper way to respond to stuff like this? You have contemplated this for years. Shouldn't you have an opinion by now? Shouldn't you know how to respond by now?

 I pondered on it a bit and concluded, You aren't being hypocritical. You are being kind. You do send heartfelt thoughts/feelings. Aren't your "sending thoughts" a type of "prayer?"  But if you say "sending prayers" to a Christian, won't they think you are sending prayers as a Christian? But that would be their assumption. If they ask, then I'd tell them I'm agnostic and that  I consider my vibes and thoughts to the universe as a type of prayer.

I felt, and feel, comfortable with that answer.

I looked up the word "prayer," it's definition and etymology, in an online English dictionary.

The first definition is: "a solemn request for help or expression of thanks addressed to God or an object of worship."

Well. I do kind of worship nature or the universe. I don't know if I exactly "worship" it. But I hold it in great awe and respect. I talk to trees and animals and clouds and whatever I think might be listening. And I feel great gratitude toward nature, the earth, her waters and resources and creatures. I wish beings like gnomes and fairies were real. I play with those kind of thoughts. So, my use of the word "prayer" gets close to "a solemn request addressed to an object of worship."

I thought of an incident when a friend (who leans toward New Age beliefs) shared that if someone asks them if they are saved, they reply, "Yes." But their definition of "saved" is different from the Christian definition. However, they don't bring that up in their answer.

Are they being disingenuous because they know the other person is asking from a biblical perspective? I don't think so. They are avoiding a possibly long, drawn-out, energy-draining dialog. If the other person would ask how they got saved and when, I wonder how my friend would respond? I'm guessing they'd define their term for "saved," or maybe they'd just say it's not something they prefer to discuss at that moment.

I may ask them next time we talk, if I remember to ask.

I thought the etymology of "prayer" would be from the word "praise." But it's not, at least not directly. However the two words appear to share some commonalities.

The etymologies for "prayer" and "praise" are:

prayer: c. 1300, from Old French prier "prayer, petition, request" (12c., Modern French prière), from Medieval Latin precaria "petition, prayer," noun use of Latin adjective precaria, fem. of precarius "obtained by prayer, given as a favor," from precari "to ask, beg, pray" (from PIE root *prek- "to ask, entreat").

praise: c. 1300, "to laud, commend, flatter," from Old French preisier, variant of prisier "to praise, value," from Late Latin preciare, earlier pretiare, from Latin pretium "reward, prize, value, worth," from PIE *pret-yo-, suffixed form of *pret-, extended form of root *per- (5) "to traffic in, to sell." Replaced Old English lof, hreþ.

Precarius, from the Latin, is part of the etymology of the word "prayer." Of course I thought of the English word, "precarious." So I looked up the etymology of "precarious." It also derives from precarius.

precarious: 1640s, a legal word, "held through the favor of another," from Latin precarius "obtained by asking or praying," from prex (genitive precis) "entreaty, prayer" (from PIE root *prek- "to ask, entreat"). Notion of "dependent on the will of another" led to extended sense "risky, dangerous, uncertain" (1680s). "No word is more unskillfully used than this with its derivatives. It is used for uncertain in all its senses; but it only means uncertain, as dependent on others ..." [Johnson]. Related: Precariously; precariousness.

The first definition of the English word "precarious" is "not securely held or in position; dangerously likely to fall or collapse." The second definition is "dependent on chance; uncertain."

"Precarious" and "prayer."
Both have roots in precarius.
Yet in their journey, one word means to entreat of a higher power with expectation of an answer.
The other means to view something as uncertain, dependent on chance and circumstance.

Precarious prayer.
Uncertain entreaty.
But aren't most entreaties uncertain?
At least in various degrees of uncertainty.

And then there is the belief about claiming an outcome in the name of Jesus Christ. In other words, it's not really an entreaty but a demand based on what the Bible says Jesus has already accomplished for the believer. The believer just needs to believe it, claim it, and act like they have already received it.

For years in my true-believer daze, I claimed Bible promises.
Sometimes it worked; other times it didn't.
That fits precarious - "dependent on chance; uncertain."