Celebratory Abortion

I viewed a video this morning of a young woman's thoughts and feelings on having an abortion.

Twenty-five year-old Emily Letts is an abortion counselor. She became pregnant herself and decided to video herself while undergoing the abortion procedure. Though the abortion procedure itself is not shown, the video does show Emily sharing during part of the procedure. She shares her thoughts about her own feelings before and after the procedure. She states her reason for publishing the video, which has had over one million hits on Youtube in the past two months, is so that the public has access to a positive abortion story. The video is only 3 minutes and 18 seconds in length.

I watched Emily on the table in her dark blue gown, with her light blue cap over her head, knowing that her legs were bent at the knees and draped and that her feet rests either in stirrups or on the table extension. Emily began some deep breathing, something I often do with any invasive procedures, from injections to pap smears. And Emily hummed, something else I often do as I warn the lab technician or doctor that I will probably sing a tune or hum and to tell me before she or he sticks me or invades my body with some foreign object. (One would think after literally thousands of pricks and needles, I'd be used to it; but, I'm not.)

Emily's breathing and humming reminded me more of a Lamaze-type exercise than what I do when my body is being intruded by non-organic tools of the trade. I thought to myself, "This is weird. It's seems like she's almost pretending to be giving birth. But Carol you know you breathe and hum with any invasive medical procedure." Still, it struck me as odd.

The abortion-procedure part of the video is accompanied by the song, "Working Woman's Blues" by Valerie June. As I listened to the song, unable to distinguish the lyrics, the melody and voice reminded me of something from times past, from deep south roots, when abortions were performed in secret, with clothes hangers. The lyrics to the first verse are:
I ain't fit to be no mother
I ain't fit to be no wife yet
I been workin' like a man, y'all
I been workin' all my life yeah

Emily's celebratory responses after the procedure come across as if she had had something like a tumor removed; she seemed detached from any emotional attachment to this part of her body being exhumed. Her only emotional response was that of freedom from an undesired burden. It was strange to me. I thought of when I had my hip removed and replaced with a titanium surrogate. I took time to thank my natural hip; to honor it in some fashion. Would I do the same with an undesirable tumor? I don't know. But then, for me, an undesired fetus is not an undesired tumor.

Emily definitely comes across that this pregnancy with the outcome of a living, breathing human life was definitely unwanted.

After viewing the video, I googled Emily Letts. One of the first links that appeared was at LifeSiteNews.com, a pro-life news outlet. The article is entitled Abortion counselor videotapes her own abortion, posts to YouTube: says it was ‘birth-like’. The article states Emily as saying, "I remember breathing and humming through it like I was giving birth." Emily's quote is from a Cosmopolitan article, Why I Filmed My Abortion, linked in the LifeSite article.

My own abortion, over 35 years ago, was not a celebratory event. There was lots of blood. I hid in a bedroom after the procedure. I cried. I proceeded to pretend it never happened and to my recollection never discussed it, until decades later. Abortion was still very much taboo in 1978; it had been made legal in 1973.

Would I have the same unpleasant event today, if I were 19 years old at this time? I do not know.

I grieved the events of that time some twenty-seven years later.

I wonder if Emily's feelings will change over time?

I wonder if her feelings will change if she ever gives birth to a babe...