Monica Pignotti, Ph.D, commented in response to one of my recent memoir-type blog entries. She addressed the questions that I posed to myself in the blog entry, questions of self-blame. I think others who choose to speak out regarding abuse of power may also pose and ponder the same questions.
I thought Monica's response comment too well-stated to sit in the comment section, so I have copied and pasted it below. (Monica's comment can be read in context here: Comments)
Monica's blog, Cyber Abuse Awareness, exposes tactics of cyber-bullying and ways to handle such.
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Monica Pignotti, Ph.D, states (italics mine):
What would you say to an ex-cult member who was taking some kind of formal action against a cult leader and also was blogging about the experience or speaking out in some way? That happens quite often. I doubt anyone would have a problem with that, yet in the anti-cult community, there appears to be a double standard.
Whether the person in question is a cult leader, an anti-cult leader, a therapist or anyone else in a position of power that is being investigated for abusing that power, a classic tactic is for that person to blame the victim for speaking out by inducing guilt and shame and many other people, even educated, intelligent people, buy into that. That blaming is not only done on the part of the cult leader or person in question, often recently defected ex-members also buy into this and blame the whistleblower. I have seen this happen among ex-Scientologists where people recently out still see those who have gone public as doing something wrong.
Inducing fear and guilt, whether it is by the cult leader or former members still buying into part of it, is a classic tactic to silence the victims. Victims who speak out are constantly told they should just "let it go" and move on with their lives. While there is nothing wrong with moving on and people making the choice not to speak publicly about their experiences, when someone chooses to do so, I don't in any way think they are doing the same thing that the person in power has done to them. That's my opinion.
As to your question about how much one should speak up, I don't think there is any one answer to that question and I have a problem with other people imposing their "shoulds" on victims and survivors. When the issue is an abuse of power, speaking out publicly can be very empowering, which is why those in power work so hard to silence whistleblowers and take that power away. How much one should speak out is something for each person to decide for him or herself and not for others to judge. That is why it has always been my position to neither discourage nor encourage people who are survivors of this kind of abuse to speak out. Whatever the person decides, it seems that there will always be people around who will sit in judgement of them, when really the judgement and focus ought to be on the perpetrator who abused the power in the first place. That's my two cents, for what it's worth.
Comment posted 9/11/11 12:16 PM
[end comment]
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Logically I know that ultimately any person of age (with reasonably sound mind and body) is responsible and accountable for their own actions. That said, there are influences that catalyze us humans to respond in certain ways. We do not abide in a bubble shielded from outside influence. We swim in it every day.
But still, in the end, we each have to answer for ourselves.
As I've said many times over: Us humans behave the way we do for reasons, sometimes unknown even to ourselves.
[Note: On the morning of August 25, 2011, my ex-therapist sent me a FB message. I discovered the message mid-morning on August 25 and responded before I headed out on a three-day backpacking trip. That was our first communication since his abrupt and harmful severing from August 2 and 3, 2010. My ex-therapist's aberrant public outbursts began late afternoon on Thursday, August 25, 2011.
Pertinent links for contexts and content regarding the outbursts are provided toward the bottom half of the page at this link: My statements addressing John M. Knapp's allegations & accusations.]
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